If you’ve been following me for awhile then I know that you’ve noticed plenty of pictures of my cute kiddos but you might have noticed the lack of something else–their names. I promise that all of my children have names. Actually, pretty great ones, if I do say so myself. However, there are a couple of reasons why we won’t be announcing baby number five’s name anytime soon. This post about our baby’s name is in collaboration with PinkBlush. I received product in exchange for my honest thoughts, all opinions are my own.
all about our baby’s name
When you’re pregnant there are a couple of questions that you get asked over and over. These include: “When are you due?”, “Do you know what you’re having?”, and “What’s his/her name?” Well, I definitely have some sarcastic answers to a few of those–“Not soon enough” and “A baby” are high on my list of responses. However, I can always honestly answer the last one with–“We don’t know”.
we truly don’t know what our baby’s name is
Mike and I have never picked out one of our children’s names before they’re born. I know that’s what most people do, some are even able to announce the name when they announce the gender. For us though, we have a hard time naming a person we haven’t met yet. We brainstorm names ahead of time and go to the hospital with a list. Once our newest bundle of joy makes their appearance than we start trying the names out and thinking about what we think our little nugget looks like. Sometimes this means our baby is named the same day they’re born. Sometimes, the hospital calls our room every hour on the day we’re supposed to be leaving because they have to fill out the Social Security paperwork. It’s hard to fill our paperwork when you don’t have a name picked.
we try to protect our children’s privacy
Even before I was a blogger my husband was pretty adamant about us not posting personal information on Facebook. When our son was born he was adamant I not share his name. At first I kind of rolled my eyes. However, as time has gone on I’m so glad he had the foresight to try and protect the privacy of our children. Let’s face it, there’s a lot of weird people out there. They don’t need to know what to call my child. We also try to be careful about the pictures that we post of our children on social media.
| Read: Keeping Kids Safe Online |
so what CAN I tell you about their names?
I won’t be announcing baby girl’s name, but there are a few things I can tell you. First of all, Mike and I always consult the Social Security Administration baby name list to see where the names we like are ranked. We try and stay out of the top 100 on that list. This list is also really neat because you can track the popularity of a name over time or by state. Secondly, all of our children have a first name that we just liked, and then a middle name that’s from one of the branches of our family tree. My sisters and I weren’t given middle names and I always kind of wanted one. I like that my own kids have meaningful middle names.
I feel good about not sharing our baby’s name. Although, sometimes I get a little wistful when I see adorable name announcements. Or when I see a child wrapped up in a personalized blanket. Or some gorgeous wall art in their nursery sporting their name. However, this is what we feel comfortable with and I think that’s important for everyone to remember. Like so many other things in life and in parenting, you need to make the decision that’s right for you and your family.
What are your thoughts on sharing you child’s information on social media?
This great maternity top is from PinkBlush. I know it’s going to transition perfectly for nursing after baby girl makes her appearance!
55 Responses to why we’re not telling you our baby’s name
I’ve put my kids names on our personal Facebook Account, and I have limits on who’s allowed to see their names. I also don’t use their names on my blogs.
Also my husband and I were exactly the same about our baby’s names. We made a short list to take to the hospital and chose the final name after each baby was born. And we refused to even share the short list with family with the second one. There was so much pushing and interference and opinions about names we eventually made that a no go conversation topic in the family. It actually caused some serious arguments in our family because everyone wanted us to name the babies in advance and according to what they wanted. Baby naming can get ugly.😬
See, that’s part of it too! I just hate hearing people’s opinions about our name choices! I don’t know why it irritates me so much.
In my case, I think part of it is my independent nature. I think my husband wanted to go a less traditional route than his family would like. And finally there was a bit of a judgment thing, we were really praying for God to give us guidance in choosing our boy’s names, and all the commentary became distracting. Besides last thing you want is feelings like your kid is being judged before they’re even born.
We did the same with our first and our one on the way, we didn’t tell anyone until we announced their birth. We had my daughter’s first name completely decided early on, but rather than have someone ruin it with “I knew someone with that name, they were *insert negative comment here*” or making faces or anything that would ruin it for us, we gave a horrible decoy name (Edith & Buford). We told them it wasn’t the actual name, but at least they had something to appease them. After a while, Edith kind of grew on everyone and my mom and grandma were even calling her Edy (we went with much prettier Evelyn and Evy, though). Everyone trying to guess was entertaining at times, annoying at others. Once the kid is born and it’s set in stone/paperwork, nobody can do anything about it. It’s your kid and your choice.
I love that you are sticking to your guns. I too try to have very limited pictures of my girls on social media. Which can sometimes be hard as a mom blogger, but like you said, lots of weird people. I’m sure whatever you chose for your girl will be awesome!
Yes, it’s such a hard balancing act when you’re blogger/influencer of sharing enough and not too much!
First off, I haven’t had any kids of my own yet. But I am already weird about posting names and photos, so I imagine I will be in the same boat as you! People are just naturally curios but at the end of the day it’s up to you two (parents).
I often wonder how you can name a baby before you meet the, too. I would think once I saw my baby, even if I had a name in mind, I would be able to confirm. Bringing a list makes sense. Hopefully we don’t pull what y’all did on baby #2 😂
Thank you for sharing, you make a lot of sense.
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment! And I know, that’s why it’s hard, because I know people are just so curious (I’m the same way!).
I soooooooooo wish I never posted my kids’ names online. The Internet was scary back then, of course, but I just wasn’t thinking. I’ve actually thought about paying someone to go back and change them to something else (I doubt that will ever happen), so now I’m just going with it, and gritting my teeth at the same time.
We had names picked out for our first born and last baby, but definitely went to the hospital with a list of names for our middle kid 🙂
Thank you for your honest Jessica! I know that some people think that Mike and I are super paranoid. 🙂
We probably won’t decide our name until we’re at the hospital either! And I so appreciate your reasoning for not sharing names online. We are the same way over here! I’m deciding on the nickname for the littlest one now! So excited for you all!
Thanks for your comment! I’m so excited for you as well, can’t wait to see pictures!
I think that’s a great way to do it! With both kids, once we’ve found out the gender, the name has fallen into place, and my husband can’t keep it secret to save his life, haha. So, we name early. And I use their names on my personal Facebook, but anything connected with my blog has nicknames and never pictures of their faces.
That’s so great that the name comes to you guys once you find out the gender, that’s awesome!
Really wonderful post! I had a traumatizing experience with someone stealing my oldest son’s photos and now I am so nervous about it happening again!
Oh my goodness, it can be SO scary, and it makes you feel so violated!
I know it’s a natural question for people to ask (and I think make small talk when you are pregnant). But it did drive me a little crazy too..and we didn’t tell.
I definitely agree that it just comes naturally to people to ask, it’s a pretty common thing for people to talk about after all and people are just curious!
LOVE IT! I usually use my kids first initial too. & truly, sometimes you won’t know the “right” name until you see them! You’ll know at the right time! Best wishes!
Thank you so much Julie!
I love this! I don’t share my kids names online either. Privacy is so important for so many reasons. I love the idea of getting to know each child before choosing a name too.
It’s so hard in this today’s age of people sharing EVERYTHING to know what’s right for you to share and not!
This makes so much sense now that you explain it. I’ve seen people calling their kids “little” or “littlest” or “Baby N” and “toddler z” and I wasn’t sure what it mean’t other than they didn’t want their kids names on the internet, you do you mama!!
Thank you Karlee!
We are staunchly team “Don’t announce the name” before the baby is born – mostly because I don’t want to hear the “Ugh, there was a bully in the 4th grade with that name and they were the WORST!” But also because 2 out of 3 times we didn’t know the sex either 🙂
Ugh, so true, I hate hearing people’s opinions!
I totally thought this was going to be about not sharing the baby name so no one close to you could snatch it up before you! (Which is what we’re afraid of). 😉
Haha, that can happen too! Luckily our tastes seem to vary greatly from what my siblings like!
Your story reminded me of my Sister In Law and how she loved the name Ava! If she had a girl, her name would be Ava! So imagine how surprised we all were when we went to meet “Ava” at the hospital and her name was so far from Ava it wasn’t even funny! My SIL simply said, “She didn’t feel like an Ava.” So I totally understand wanting to meet your child before choosing their name. All of my boys have family names for their middle names too! I like to say that when they are acting up they are acting like the person they were named after 😉
That’s what happened to my mom with me. She was adamant that I was going to be called Sunny whether I was a boy or a girl, then I was born and she was like, nope! She doesn’t even know where she heard the name Justine, lol.
This! I do not yet have kids of my own, but I have *several* friends that had names picked out that they abandoned once they actually meant their little ones for the first time.
And when my mom was pregnant w/ my older sibling (her first child) my parents had a name all set and said it often as they spoke to the growing baby bump. Trouble was, when my mom gave birth it turned out the little girl they’d been expecting was actually a little boy and they hadn’t even thought about boys names!
You just never know!
Haha! I actually had a friend that happened to several years ago!
I agree that it is hard to name a person before you meet them, great post thanks for sharing.
Thanks so much April!
I love this. I didn’t name my last two kids until we had them. I think people need to relax and enjoy the ride. People don’t need to harp on the expecting couple what they are having or what they are naming the baby. Gees that name business opens a door for too many opinions.
Yes Rose! Thank you for your comment!
Before I ever got pregnant I was for sure naming my daughter Jordyn for years I was sat on that then I got pregnant and it didn’t feel right. When people asked I started to tell them names I liked and every time someone would say why they don’t like that name. I was so sick of it I just told pepole we don’t know and we didn’t really because we just had a list when we went to the hospital. It is also amazing how upset people get about us not posting pictures. I fear for my friends kids who post pictures of them in front of the school sign of they go to for their 1st day of school. now people know their name and school and parents names so scary.
I so agree! I think some people should be a little more careful about what they post, but I guess everyone just shares what they feel comfortable with. And I also agree about not wanting to hear people’s opinions, I don’t even like to share the names we’re thinking about anymore for that very reason!
I completely understand wanting to respect your children’s privacy and keep them safe. My husband and I did it a little differently – where we shared our daughters name, but we don’t share photos of her. I actually no longer use social media and my husband doesn’t post much, and we kind of like people not being in our business so much! I didn’t know the guideline that photos are less likely to be taken if an adult is in the photo, but that totally makes sense.
I think it’s important to do whatever you feel comfortable with! Thanks for commenting!
Setting boundaries is so important for helping our kids feel safe! Good for you for knowing exactly where your line is.
So much to say on this! We, too, are not sharing the 5-6 names that we have in mind for our first baby girl – everyone has an opinion and is not afraid to share it with you! We gave in and told my Mom and her immediate response was “…I like all of them except xyz…” Exactly why we weren’t telling you. We don’t care if you don’t like it. It’s our child!
With regards to posting photos and names on social media – this is a topic of conversation for my husband and I right now. We own a bar & grill so between the two of us we have a pretty extensive friend list & especially with my husband we have people that maybe have visited us 1-2 times adding him that we don’t know squat about. I don’t need those people knowing anything personal about our home life and especially not about our child. We are trying to compromise at creating a small privacy list of family & our closest friends that should we post anything it will only be shared with that limited list. Also, asking others *not* to share pictures of our child I foresee as being a challenge, too. It’s a whole new beast to deal with!
With our first one we had a name picked out about 10 days after we found out we were pregnant and luckily it was a boy and the name fits him perfectly. We told everyone the name before he was was born, and I felt my family was social media crazy and social media met my son before I was fully aware of what was going on. My daughter on the other hand, we told family no social media until 1 I announced the arrival of he baby, and 2 I was home from the hospital. We didn’t tell anyone our daughters name until after she was born, just my husband and I knew. It was a nice surprise that we got to keep to ourselves until she was born, and I plan on doing that with our next child too!
I love this. We don’t post anything online about either of our kids, pictures or names. Most people who I don’t talk to on a regular basis don’t even know I have kids 😂. We want them to be able to create their own online presence when they get older, and to not have all of their childhood photos online. It is hard not to when everyone else is posting pictures of their kids. We tried keeping the names secret before they were born, but neither of us are good at keeping secrets.
I love this!!! We do not post any pictures of our daughters face on social media. Except one time for her first birthday we did a fundraiser and I said when we reached our goal I would post ONE picture of her face. We ended up reaching our goal super fast and raised $1000 for the families staying at the Ronald McDonald House. We got lots of flack about not posting pictures of her from our social media friends. She was in the NICU for awhile and back then people would staright up ask me if something was wrong with her face. Who does that? I love not sharing her face with the world I wish we would of done this with our older boys. The internet is a scary place indeed. I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way.
Thank you so much for your comment and support Rebecca! And I don’t know why people say and do the things they do… I think they just don’t think things though sometimes.
Lately I’ve just been using my three-year-old’s first initial, but at first I was regularly using her name. Then I realized I maybe shouldn’t! We aren’t sharing our baby girl’s name until she is born, partly because we don’t want to hear opinions and want to keep it between us, but also because we reserve the right to change our mind when we meet her! ha Love this post.
Totally! I really hate hearing peoples opinions about names, I don’t know why! And then if you change your mind they act like it’s the worst thing you could do!
Or…..you could just stay off of Facebook and/or social media completely! It’s a surefire way to help keep your family’s privacy and avoid everyone’s opinions! That is the route I take and I haven’t the need to worry about who’s stalking me online!
Yep, that’s one way to go too for sure! Although, I know a lot of people use social media to keep in constant contact with family and friends that live far away, and for bloggers or influencers that’s not really an option, but it definitely works for some people! Thanks for reading! 🙂
We left the gender and names we chose out a surprise, it drove people crazy! But it made our son’s birth that much more special!
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