At the beginning of my third trimester we played “Two Truths and A Lie” over on Instagram. I always like playing that with y’all because it’s fun to see what people think. But this particular edition led to a really interesting discussion on epidurals when I revealed that I’d never had one. Now that baby girl is over two months old I thought it was finally time to share some of my thoughts on epidurals.
my thoughts on epidurals
using the term “natural childbirth”
It’s true I’ve never had an epidural but I’ve also never used the term natural childbirth. Trust me, I understand what people are trying to say. But using the word “natural” to describe childbirth implies that any other way is UNnatural. Therefore implying that there’s something natural, normal, and better about having an unmedicated birth experience. And that there’s something unnatural, weird, and worse about choosing medication for assistance. I don’t buy that whatsoever. I think the only unnatural thing about childbirth would be if the baby never came out and decided to grow to adulthood in your womb. Could we please come up with a different term and circulate it widely??
why I don’t get epidurals
The truth is that the reason I don’t want an epidural has changed over the years. Let me be very clear that I have no issues with needles whatsoever. I’ve had my blood drawn so many times that it doesn’t even phase me. I’ve had needles for vaccines and needles for numbing and needles to save my life during asthma attacks. Needles of all sizes all over my body. Okay, that sounds like I have some type of a problem. The point is, I’m not afraid of needles. But one sticking in my spine? No thank you. That’s a BIG heck no. And I’ve heard too many horror stories of epidurals going horribly wrong.
So initially that was why I wanted to avoid one. But after my first baby I learned some other things too. Epidurals can often make labor longer, although some people say that epidurals have made their labors shorter. Epidurals can make it harder the pushing process longer since your body can’t feel when it naturally wants to. Or sometimes they don’t even work or don’t work fast enough—yikes! I’m not saying these things to scare anyone, simply to share some reasons why I have never wanted one.
what I do instead of epidurals
Y’all, labor and childbirth is hard. Obviously if you don’t get an epidural you need some way to cope with the pain. Please keep in mind that these are techniques that work for me. I have never taken a childbirth class and I’m sure there are better “methods” out there.
early labor techniques
First of all, I labor as long as possible at home. I tend to make much more progress when I can labor at home the way I want to instead of other people constantly interrupting.
I’m upright as much as possible. Especially in early labor I stand, walk, and sway as much as I can. This last time I also bounced for awhile on an exercise ball. I especially noticed this time that my contractions would nearly stop when I layed down in the bed, but would be regular and closer together when I stood up.
pain management in transition
I zone out completely during “bad” contractions, closing my eyes and just breathing through them. I make as little noise as possible, maybe low hums but that’s it. Being quiet and controlled helps my thoughts stay more on relaxing and off of the pain that I’m experiencing.
Another tip I have is to gently push during contractions. These “pushes” should be very small and gentle as you’re standing. Although this doesn’t help much with pain management, it does help get the baby lower. I also believe it’s one of the reasons why usually the pushing portion hasn’t been that intense for me—because I’ve already been helping the baby move along for a while.
Towards the end when the contractions are most intense I rely on counter pressure. My poor husband is a rockstar during this portion. Suring contractions as I stand leaning against the bed for support he pushes on my hips HARD.
most importantly
Remember that a birth plan is important but so is being flexible. Have a plan but also have an open mind. With my first childbirth I nearly needed an emergency C-section because I wasn’t progressing. I was exhausted and devastated. It could have really tainted my view of the whole experience. However, I asked if there was something else we could do for pain management and they suggested an IV drug. Although I’m glad I haven’t needed to repeat that for another labor, I really believe it saved me from having a C-section. Look into birthing classes and find one that works for you. But be prepared to drop it and find something else if the process they’re talking about doesn’t seem like it’s a good fit for you and your situation.
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