I recently found out my child was being bullied at school. Did you know that one out of five kids report being bullied? As I was often bullied and ostracized growing up it’s familiar territory for me. But it still brings out the momma bear in me to hear that my child is the center of another child’s insecurities. He didn’t even mention anything at first, but he opened up about what had been going on after another parent brought it to my attention. Since confronting a child would be an act of bullying on my part, here’s what I’d like to say to the bullies.

what I’d like to say to the bullies

To the kids bullying my son,

I feel sorry for you. Sorry that you think this is appropriate behavior. Since our behavior is as much nurture as nature I can only assume that someone in your own life has bullied you. Or that you’ve never been taught what basic respect is. Or maybe both. The saying that “hurt people hurt people” is absolutely true, so your actions make me incredibly sad for you.

I feel sorry for you. Sorry that you are choosing fear rather than kindness. You have surrounded yourself with peers you call “friends” but they’re really more like minions, there to do your bidding. It’s sad that all the people you choose to surround yourself are probably there so that they don’t become your next target.

| In Defense of Large Families |

I feel sorry for you. Sorry that you won’t get the chance to really get to know my son, because he’s a pretty awesome kid. Is he perfect? No. Is he a little introverted and awkward? Most definitely. But he’s also incredibly kind, clever, polite, and generous. He’s quirky to be sure, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve learned that our weirdness makes life more fun.

I feel sorry for you. Sorry because my son will be an even more awesome version of himself after this is all over. I know because I was bullied as a child—ridiculed and teased almost daily. For what I looked like, what I wore, what I did, what I said. I was excluded and often worse. You know what though? It made me want to be more kind and more accepting. What will you be when you grow up? Probably a bigger version of the bully you are now. You’ll never learn what to say to bullies, so I hope your own children never go through this.

Has your kid ever been bullied?

If you or your child need help or resources check out stopbullying.gov